Swollen Pickles

Body image is a big deal for a lot of people. If you took a vote of 10 random people, I'd say 70% would be unhappy with at least one aspect of their physical appearance. I mean, I think I could be a little be hotter, but then you can't have everything. That's why I found this link, sent to me by Nerd Central's very own Queen of the Nerds, interesting.

http://www.fluideffect.com/

Click on the link above, then click 'portfolio' followed by 'before/after'.

It really highlights the fact that if you have enough money, or enough nerds at your disposal, you don't have to worry about your body image at all. A little bit of tweaking in photoshop and you can be the perfect you no matter what the bathroom lights and mirrors tell you!

The Age blog is reporting a very disturbing story this morning. You may remember the crappy US teen sitcom "Saved by the Bell". Staying true to the sitcom formula of the time, "Saved by the Bell" featured a Steve Urkel style character called Screech. Screech made me feel a whole lot better about myself. Well apparently Screech has fallen upon some tough times financially, not so tough though that he couldn't spare the time to film himself having a 'threesome' with two women! According to the Age, his manager is looking at selling the sex tape to the highest bidder. This is the celebrity sex tape scandal you never wanted to see. Arguably this one will compete with the Chyna (female WWE wrestler) 'honeymoon' tape for the title of most disturbing celebrity sex tape in history. You can read the full blog post on the Age website.

p.s Lil' Gerry specifically requested 'finders' credit for this one, stating that he "did not want to be diddled on this one". That statement is disturbing enough in itself as far as I'm concerned!

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I finished Call of Duty: Finest Hour last night. It took me quite a while actually, the first levels were quite easy but the difficulty really lifted a few notches in the second half of the game. Call of Duty: Finest Hour is a first person shooter set in World War 2, and unlike previous Call of Duty games I've played, this time around you play as Russian, British and US soldiers. The Russian missions were quite straight forward, with the main challenge coming from the sniper mission (took me a while to get the hang of the sniper rifle). The British missions, set in the desert, were all relatively easy, and were not all that long. The US missions, taking place during the charge toward Berlin, are the toughest and longest (particularly between checkpoints/save points).

This isn't one of those sort of first person shooters where you can just charge around like a mad man. Some care and strategy are required to get through. I made plenty of use of the crouch/lie down feature, which apparently makes you a harder target to hit, whilst also improving your aim.

The last two levels caused me some genuine frustration, but I got there in the end. One tip, when clearing the gun turret at the top of the left tower, do not assume that the "left machine gun turret neutralised" message means that there are no enemy soldiers still alive up there. I made this mistake the first time, got whacked and had to start the level all over again.
This was a fun game. Get it if you like first person shooters.

Many of you will know of my associate Bean Bag Boy, he's a D Grade celebrity here at Nerd Central. So I'm sitting on the couch watching TV and surfing the web when he walks out in business shirt and budgie smugglers and asks, "is this too comfortable?"

YES!

"Well, I'm the best there is. Plain and simple, when I wake up in the morning I piss excellence." I think it needs to be said from the outset, Talladega Nights is not high brow sophisticated comedy. It shares a lot in common with films like Happy Gilmour and Anchorman. Actually if those two films bumped uglies then Talladega Nights would be the end result. The character of Ricky Bobby provides Will Ferrell with some great material, and majority of the laughs are a result of his character clashing with his nemesis, Jean Girard, a gay French Formula One star, played by Sacha Baron Cohen (best known for portraying Ali G/Borat). Jean Girard is a complex guy, "My husband Gregory and I want what any couple wants. To retire to Stockholm and develop a currency for dogs and cats to use."

There are some genuinely funny moments in Talladega Nights, but it's probably best not to over intellectualise things. It's comedy you don't need to think about. If a grown man running around in white Y-fronts and a crash helmet, trying to put out invisible flames, amuses you, then you will enjoy Talladega Nights.

Just took the "Which Metal Band are you?"�Quiz. The results are in, and apparently I'm Opeth.

"You are Opeth! You are very poetic with your lyrics, and your music flows like a waterfall. Your emotions change from angry to sad very quickly. Some people don't like you because you can sound too depressing. You're one of the best metal bands in the world, and you worship your fans! "

That's cool I suppose. I don't mind being Nordic Metal.

Speaking of Opeth, I ordered the DVD 'Opeth: Live from Sheperds Bush' a while ago. I have to say, I'm an Opeth fan, up until the cookie monster style death metal vocals kick in. The lead singer has a decent clean voice, but the cookie monster stuff just turns me right off. The DVD itself isn't too bad. Audio wise it's very solid, visually it's fairly dull (by fairly dull, I mean there is absolutely no pyro). The 'bonus' documentary is interesting, don't think it warrants a repeat viewing though. Keep an eye out for Steven Wilson from the Porcupine Tree who helped produce some of Opeth's stuff. Even if you don't like the vocals, or the style of music, you have to appreciate their musicianship. It's freakin' awesome.

As long as there is the internet, and blogs, there will be people slagging off celebrities. Easy targets? Yes. It's hardly sport, but that doesn't mean it can't still be fun. Apparently the online world agrees. I stumbled across a list of the blog worlds 'ten most hated celebrities'. Hate is such a strong word. Without the ten shining stars that made the list, half of the worlds bloggers wouldn't have anything to write about! Looking down the list there aren't many surprises but you can check it out for yourself here:

http://popbytes.com/archive/2006/09/bloggers_do_most_hated_celebs.shtml

Tara Reid looks elegantly wasted, Paris Hilton predictably claims the top spot, but my favourite quote from the top 10 list refers to the star of 'Mean Girls', Lindsey Lohan.

"At this point, there's really no difference between Lindsay, Paris, and one of those 'blow up sex dolls'."

That says it all really!