Archive for December, 2006

Stay (Movie Review)

Thursday, December 28th, 2006

**

From the opening scene you just know that ‘Stay’ is going to be a head trip. Starring Ewan McGregor it’s a film big on style, but a little low on substance.

‘Stay’ essentially tells the story of a psychiatrist, Ewan McGregor, attempting to prevent one of his patients from committing suicide, whilst at the same time maintaining his own grip on reality.

The film definitely has an artistic quality to it with some dreamy visuals, but plot wise it felt a bit hollow. I’m sure you could interpret it in a deep and meaningful way, and compare it favorably with a lot of David Lynch’s films, but in Staydoing all that, you’re probably rating it a little too highly.

When it all boils down to it, the ending was somewhat disappointing, particularly given the extensive buildup. The telegraphed ‘twist’ didn’t help the films overall rating, and any film that concludes with an ending that amounts to little more than ‘…and it was all just a dream’ deserves to lose points!

Overall the film has some interesting moments, although the subject matter (suicide) does not make for a warm and fuzzy movie watching experience. Watch it for the trippy visuals, not for the cutting edge plot.

House of the Dead 2 (Movie Review)

Wednesday, December 27th, 2006

½

This film should carry a warning! I demand 90 minutes of my life back! ‘House of the Dead 2: Dead Aim’ is a “based on the video game” film, and the sequel to Uwe Boll’s 2003 steaming turd, ‘House of the Dead’.

The film opens in a US college, with frat boys hosing down scantily clad women in white tank tops. Things take a nasty turn when Sid Haig (from the Rob Zombie films ‘House of 1000 corpses’ and ‘The Devils Rejects’) enters the picture as Professor Curien. Professor Curien has been experimenting with re-animating the dead, and you don’t have to be a rocket scientist to realize that this will all lead to some disastrous consequences. The zombie infection quickly takes hold of the Campus, and 29 days later the AMS is called in to deal with the situation.

House of the Dead 2: Dead AimTo summarize, soldiers shoot zombies, zombies eat soldiers, soldiers run from zombies, more shooting, more eating, and then the moving ends leaving the door wide open for a sequel.

This film is, at best, very loosely based on the video game, with Professor Curien, the AMS and the zombies themselves, providing the only obvious links.

Almost everything about this movie is laughable, right down to the tagline: “It Took Only A Single Zombie To Spawn An Army. It'll Take Everything Humanity Has To Stop It.”

If “everything humanity has” is ten dodgy looking guys playing soldier, and screaming ‘Sarge’ every so often, then humanity is in big trouble!

Perhaps the only thing more laughable than the tagline is the fact that someone decided it was a good idea to hand over $6 million US to produce this travesty. 

If you want to bitch about how bad you thought House of the Dead 2 was then join the forum and add to the thread here.

Teen Queen sacked

Friday, December 22nd, 2006

Big news as Miss Nevada USA is "stripped" of her title after some "racy" photos turned up on the internet.

According to the Age, some "of the photos show Katie Rees kissing other women and exposing one of her breasts. "Katie Rees has been relieved of her duties as Miss Nevada USA 2007," said Paula M Shugart, president of the Miss Universe Organisation, which owns the Miss USA pageant."

Red blooded men around the world are collectively sitting at the computers hitting 'refresh' in the hope the "racy" photos turn up in their inbox!

Christmas well wishes from Swollen Pickles

Thursday, December 21st, 2006

It's almost Christmas, a time to relax with family and friends, watch the Boxing Day Test Match, and eat until you can't eat anymore. As some of you well know, I'm a very busy and important person, so I don't have the time to send out individualised Christmas cheer and well wishes.

With that in mind, please find attached my Christmas message to the world.

 

xmas message

 

Stay classy people.

The Swollen Pickles Forum returns

Tuesday, December 19th, 2006

After a couple of monumental stuff ups the Swollen Pickles Forum has sprung back to life. It's looking a bit weird at this stage but it's fully functional which is an excellent start. Check it out if your bored... if your not bored though I have to ask... what are you doing here??? :P

Fallout from the PayPerPost Disclosure Statement announcement

Monday, December 18th, 2006

In a move that will probably surprise absolutely no one, PayPerPost have announced that they will now require paid posts to feature some kind of disclosure statement, either within the post or somewhere on the site that the post appears on.

Probably then no real surprise that the whole thing received some pretty solid coverage on TechCrunch either. If TechCrunch readers hadn't heard of PayPerPost before all this, then I'm sure that they will have now! Actually, I'm sure there are a lot of PayPerPost participants (me included) who hadn't heard of TechCrunch prior to this either for that matter.

There are two big winners out of the whole disclosure issue.

At the end of the day, PayPerPost come out of the controversy looking like a responsible corporation, having addressed the concerns of some of their toughest critics, whilst receiving a great deal of free publicity in the process.

TechCrunch come out of it as the 'Bloggers Champion', taking on the big bad corporate world and 'forcing' change.

It's interesting to see how the announcement has been received. The comments that follow the TechCrunch post are mixed, but are generally more positive than negative. The number of comments alone indicates that controversy sells, and it appears a lot of people are buying!

ProBlogger points to a conspiracy theory, but the fact that the stories feature the words "My sources tell me..." raises a few questions. Interesting theory none the less, and one I'm sure quite a few people share.

Perhaps the best outcome of the announcement is that the whole issue can be put to bed and those who have occupied the moral high ground can finally descend from their mount.

Personally, I don't feel that anyone serving advertising on their site has the right to take any sort of moral high ground on this issue. If the blog world is going to turn on those that use PayPerPost to supplement their income, then perhaps it's time they also turn their attention to those that employ the standard practice of adsense blending? Blending advertisements to give the appearance of content, is that better or worse than PayPerPost in the eyes of the blogging "A List"? Is participating in PayPerPost more or less evil than using Google AdSense, Text Link Ads or Yahoo Advertising?

I think it's time the geek community gave the whole thing a break, it's getting old, there is no good vs evil battle going on here. It's just a case of people trying to make the best of what they have.

Kanye used me as a catapult, says Evel Knievel

Friday, December 15th, 2006

World famous daredevil Evel Knievel is suing Kanye West over Kayne's film clip for 'Touch the Sky'. If you haven't seen the video, Kayne plays the role of "Evel Kanyevel" and tries to jump a massive cannon on a rocket powered motorcycle.

According to the Age website today, "Knievel, whose real name is Robert Craig Knievel, filed suit in federal court in Tampa yesterday claiming infringement on his trademarked name and likeness. He also claims the "vulgar and offensive" images depicted in the video damage his reputation."

"That video that Kanye West put out is the most worthless piece of crap I've ever seen in my life, and he uses my image to catapult himself on the public," Knievel, 68, said today.

I'm hoping that the 'catapult' line is some kind of funny pun or play on words type thing!

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