- Jack Bauer never retreats, he just attacks in the opposite direction.
- When a convicted terrorist was sentenced to face Jack Bauer, he appealed to have the sentence reduced to death.
- The city of Los Angeles once named a street after Jack Bauer in gratitude for his saving the city several times. They had to rename it after people kept dying when they tried to cross the street. No one crosses Jack Bauer and lives.
- When Jack Bauer ran out of ammo, he caught 3 bullets in his chest and used them to reload.
- Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.
- Jack Bauer could strangle you with a cordless phone.
- Jack Bauer was never addicted to heroin. Heroin was addicted to Jack Bauer.
- On a high school math test, Jack Bauer put down "Violence" as every one of the answers. He got an A+ on the test because Jack Bauer solves all his problems with Violence.
- Jack Bauer brought sexy back, then shot Justin Timberlake for trying to take the credit.
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