Comments on: Ever been mistaken as a member of the opposite sex? http://www.swollenpickles.com/2008/09/24/ever-been-mistaken-as-a-member-of-the-opposite-sex/ Me fail English? That's unpossible! Wed, 17 Mar 2010 22:23:33 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.1 hourly 1 By: doubleplanet http://www.swollenpickles.com/2008/09/24/ever-been-mistaken-as-a-member-of-the-opposite-sex/comment-page-1/#comment-19157 doubleplanet Sat, 15 Nov 2008 19:46:42 +0000 http://www.swollenpickles.com/?p=1303#comment-19157 My face shape, hairline, height, etc. are such that when my hair is long, I look like an unattractive woman; and when it's short, I look more attractive but quite androgenous. Since I dislike the feel of junk on my face (make-up, that is) and can't be bothered fussing with long hair, I have a fair bit of experience at being mistaken for a man. (Down jackets are particularly bad for this. When it's not freezing, I dress to emphasize my bustline -- it's not skankiness, it's self-defence!) Being over 50, I remember feeling the irony at the moment I looked over all my earrings -- relatively modest, lots of studs -- and thought, "I have to buy new earrings. These are all MEN's earrings!" My voice is relatively deep for a woman, as well, so it’s REALLY easy to mistake me. Even so, the first few times I was mistaken for a guy, I felt a bit insulted. But I stopped correcting people, because they often get very embarrassed about it -- while at the same time giving me a look that says, "So get a makeover, honey!" A very few even go so far as to get insulting. The thing is, people just don't like feeling confused. They don't even recognize that it's just confusion; they just know that they don't like how they feel, and have to turn it into something else, like embarrassment or anger, that they CAN recognize -- and then blame you for. I think this is why homophobes and maybe racists find it so hard to let go of their hatred and recognize it as being pretty much baseless. There has to be SOME reason they feel so yucky in some situations, so they go looking for the source -- sometimes with a gang of friends who feel similarly, to ease any lingering guilt or uncertainty -- and hate crimes result. It's so tragic. A little confusion just isn't that big a deal, but they overcompensate and imagine all sorts of "valid" reasons for their discomfort. Think I'm exaggerating? Ask Canadians what happened when gay marriage was legalized, and they'll tell you: Nothing. There was no damage to the fabric of society whatsoever -- just a few florists, caterers and wedding photographers making a little more money than usual. That's a long way of saying, that Englishwoman really needs to get over herself! At her age, she should be way past such childishness. Perhaps her husband is just hoping to profit from this . . . little bit of confusion. My face shape, hairline, height, etc. are such that when my hair is long, I look like an unattractive woman; and when it’s short, I look more attractive but quite androgenous. Since I dislike the feel of junk on my face (make-up, that is) and can’t be bothered fussing with long hair, I have a fair bit of experience at being mistaken for a man. (Down jackets are particularly bad for this. When it’s not freezing, I dress to emphasize my bustline — it’s not skankiness, it’s self-defence!)
Being over 50, I remember feeling the irony at the moment I looked over all my earrings — relatively modest, lots of studs — and thought, “I have to buy new earrings. These are all MEN’s earrings!”
My voice is relatively deep for a woman, as well, so it’s REALLY easy to mistake me. Even so, the first few times I was mistaken for a guy, I felt a bit insulted. But I stopped correcting people, because they often get very embarrassed about it — while at the same time giving me a look that says, “So get a makeover, honey!” A very few even go so far as to get insulting.
The thing is, people just don’t like feeling confused. They don’t even recognize that it’s just confusion; they just know that they don’t like how they feel, and have to turn it into something else, like embarrassment or anger, that they CAN recognize — and then blame you for.
I think this is why homophobes and maybe racists find it so hard to let go of their hatred and recognize it as being pretty much baseless. There has to be SOME reason they feel so yucky in some situations, so they go looking for the source — sometimes with a gang of friends who feel similarly, to ease any lingering guilt or uncertainty — and hate crimes result.
It’s so tragic. A little confusion just isn’t that big a deal, but they overcompensate and imagine all sorts of “valid” reasons for their discomfort.
Think I’m exaggerating? Ask Canadians what happened when gay marriage was legalized, and they’ll tell you: Nothing. There was no damage to the fabric of society whatsoever — just a few florists, caterers and wedding photographers making a little more money than usual.
That’s a long way of saying, that Englishwoman really needs to get over herself! At her age, she should be way past such childishness.
Perhaps her husband is just hoping to profit from this . . . little bit of confusion.

]]> By: swollenpickles http://www.swollenpickles.com/2008/09/24/ever-been-mistaken-as-a-member-of-the-opposite-sex/comment-page-1/#comment-18114 swollenpickles Mon, 06 Oct 2008 22:50:03 +0000 http://www.swollenpickles.com/?p=1303#comment-18114 Currently 17 votes yes, 0 votes no. Not a great result I wouldn't have thought. Currently 17 votes yes, 0 votes no. Not a great result I wouldn’t have thought.

]]> By: blankshooting http://www.swollenpickles.com/2008/09/24/ever-been-mistaken-as-a-member-of-the-opposite-sex/comment-page-1/#comment-18103 blankshooting Mon, 06 Oct 2008 10:44:00 +0000 http://www.swollenpickles.com/?p=1303#comment-18103 hottie mc hot hot! hottie mc hot hot!

]]> By: David Rader http://www.swollenpickles.com/2008/09/24/ever-been-mistaken-as-a-member-of-the-opposite-sex/comment-page-1/#comment-18011 David Rader Sun, 28 Sep 2008 16:11:54 +0000 http://www.swollenpickles.com/?p=1303#comment-18011 I think they were justified, but they could have just not mentioned any sex. E.g. "Please confirm whether Mr. or Mrs. Blah was the driver on this day." If the woman doesn't see how she may be mistaken as a man though, especially in a good bit of shade, maybe she should be checked into a psychiatric hospital. I've thought men were women and women were men before, but I don't think I should have given compensation for my mistake in observation, in fact, I think the compensation they should get is a WAKE UP CALL THAT THEY LOOK LIKE A MEMBER OF THE OPPOSITE SEX and they should feel lucky as hell that they weren't in a cafeteria with a loud speaker, "mister standing by the window, you forgot your change here at the window!" I think they were justified, but they could have just not mentioned any sex. E.g. “Please confirm whether Mr. or Mrs. Blah was the driver on this day.”

If the woman doesn’t see how she may be mistaken as a man though, especially in a good bit of shade, maybe she should be checked into a psychiatric hospital. I’ve thought men were women and women were men before, but I don’t think I should have given compensation for my mistake in observation, in fact, I think the compensation they should get is a WAKE UP CALL THAT THEY LOOK LIKE A MEMBER OF THE OPPOSITE SEX and they should feel lucky as hell that they weren’t in a cafeteria with a loud speaker, “mister standing by the window, you forgot your change here at the window!”

]]> By: swollenpickles http://www.swollenpickles.com/2008/09/24/ever-been-mistaken-as-a-member-of-the-opposite-sex/comment-page-1/#comment-17999 swollenpickles Thu, 25 Sep 2008 01:11:44 +0000 http://www.swollenpickles.com/?p=1303#comment-17999 I have heard that. I have heard that.

]]> By: blankshooting http://www.swollenpickles.com/2008/09/24/ever-been-mistaken-as-a-member-of-the-opposite-sex/comment-page-1/#comment-17998 blankshooting Wed, 24 Sep 2008 17:09:53 +0000 http://www.swollenpickles.com/?p=1303#comment-17998 you know that they're not all as pretty as her, right? you know that they’re not all as pretty as her, right?

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