Swollen Pickles

The Kanye West VMA's fiasco has raised the hackles of 99.9% of the worlds population. His treatment of Taylor Swift was not one of his smoother moves. I, myself, am no stranger to public humiliation, so I had a hard time not sympathizing with Ms Swift.

Kanye's out burst has made him some very powerful enemies. Number one on the list, Hitler. Here's what he had to say about the Kanye-gate affair.

"That stupid Kanye! That shit was uncalled for ... I just want to shave my moustache and wipe it on my ass and shove it down his nostrils."

Now I'm sure Kayne will be able to use all of the controversy on his next average album, people will buy it, and he'll get richer. But all that will not change the fact that he has pissed off Hitler, and that cannot be a good thing for anyone!

As President of the United States, you'd expect Barack Obama to have an eye for detail. Over at the G8 summit, Barack Obama and France's President Nicolas Sarkozy were lining up for some photos with junior G8 delegates, when a press snapper caught this candid moment.

This photo makes me feel happy because it show that now matter who you are, where you grew up or what position you may hold in the world, when you boil it all down, the men of the world all share the same DNA.

With the anticipation of the next installment of the Transformers franchise continues to build, the films stars have hit the promotional trail to make sure it's not a box office bomb.

Here in Australia, we had former Home and Away starlet Isabel Lucas talking the talk. She appeared on Rove Sunday night, and I have to say, she is damn lucky she's easy on the eye, because otherwise she'd have all the appeal of a three week old burrito.

If you're after 8mins of flat out excitement you can watch the interview below.

According to the fountain of knowledge, Wikipedia, Lucas "suffered a minor head injury in July 2008 in a car accident while she was a passenger in, Transformers co-star, Shia LaBeouf's car". Maybe she still suffering some super delayed side effects.

Here's a little more, with Ross Noble attempting to inject her with a little personality.

Kichler Indoor 300W Bronze Landscape Transformer

US $260.00

15m

Transformers Takara D 308 BROWNING MIB JAPANESE GEM

0 Bid

US $749.00

15m

Coldplay have found themselves smack bang in the middle of another plagiarism bun fight. Guitar virtuoso Joe Satriani has claimed that Coldplay have copied elements of his 2004 song "If I Could Fly" for their track "Viva La Vida".

In an interview with Musicrader.com Satriani stresses that he was motivated by a desire to protect his art.

"Everybody's assumes I'm trying to go after these guys in Coldplay, as if I'm doing this with malice," he says "That's the furthest thing from my mind. I'm just doing what I need to do as an artist, to protect what's mine, to protect those feelings I put down in song.

"I did everything I could to avoid a court case with this situation. But Coldplay didn't want to talk about it. They just wanted this whole thing to go away. Maybe they figured this little guitar player guy will leave them alone after a while, I don't know.

Now at this point I would love to include the video that was posted on YouTube that compared to two tracks so that you could have a listen for yourself, and make up your own mind, but that's a little difficult for me to do now because EMI, who happen to be the Coldplay's record company, have asked that YouTube to remove it. So instead of the comparison video, and nice little mashup at the end, you get this message:

This video is no longer available due to a copyright claim by EMI Music

EMI don't seem to have a problem with the massive number of other Coldplay videos on YouTube so conspiracy theorists can read into this how they like. Would the record company remove the clip if that didn't think there was anything in it? (more...)

I have to confess, I love to catch a glimpse of a celebrity mug shot. The dear in the head lights look is right up there with Magnum and Blue Steel in my book.

The latest celebrity to get the mug shot treatment? Heather Locklear.

The Age are reporting that:

Actress Heather Locklear has been arrested on suspicion of driving under the influence of a controlled substance in California's upmarket Santa Barbara area, authorities have said.

Locklear, 47, was pulled over by a California Highway Patrol officer on the weekend after a resident reported seeing the actress leaving a parking lot and "driving erratically", patrol spokesman Tom Marshall said.

Here's the Heather Locklear mug shot, to file next to the Lindsay Lohan mug shot of yesteryear.

Even slightly disheveled and not at the peak of her powers, I have to say, she looks ok for a 47 year old.

8x10 GLOSSY PHOTO OF HEATHER LOCKLEAR

0 Bid

US $3.00

1h 6m

Farrah Fawcett David Archuleta Heather Locklear Naomi

US $9.99

1h 34m

HEATHER LOCKLEAR SEXY SIGNED 8x10 COLOR PHOTO COA

US $21.95

1h 52m

Gary Busey may just be crazy. I'm not sure why I haven't come across this clip sooner, but then, better late than never.

Who's Gary Busey? He's that guy from Point Break, not Keanu Reeves or Patrick Swayze, the other guy. He's also that guy from Predator 2, no, not Danny Glover, but the other guy, the government agent that gets sliced in half by the Predator's throwing disc.

To set the scene, Busey is taking part in a photo shoot for photographer Tyler Shields, for Shields' book, The Dirty Side of Glamour, of which the proceeds are given to charity. A reporter from Inside Edition was sent along to cover the shoot as well as ask Busey a couple of question regarding his 'new film'.

"I am gonna pull your endocrine system out of your body!" WOW!

It reminds me a little of "When Actor And Director Don't Get Along" only with a little extra crazy thrown in for good measure.
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“Australia’s Hottest Party Girl”, well according to FHM anyway, Krystal Forscutt, is heading to LA to try and break it in the US. Yes, it’s old news, but then, I’m slow, and aren’t big on keeping abreast of current affairs.

Aussies may remember Krystal from Big Brother, as the surgically enhanced ‘bombshell’ who seemed to spend 99% of her time in a bikini. Since then she’s become a regular in “mens” magazines like Zoo, and FHM.

Now ordinarily, this sort of thing wouldn’t make news at the office of Swollen Pickles, however this time, I’m going to make an exception, for two reasons. First, I have a couple of pictures that are sure to “stir the loins” of some of my readers, and second, I’d like to draw attention to her breakout quote.

Now take a look at the following picture. Try, if you can, to drag your attention to the pull quote attributed to Krystal to the top left of the image.

“LA is going to be a lot of work – a lot of castings and sleeping on couches.” Wow. LA, casting and sleeping on couches in the one sentence. Let your imagination run for a while, and see where it ends up!

Ahh… in training for the LA adventure, here’s Krystal holding a massive tool.